English made easier !

The European commission have just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU, rather than German which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's government conceded that English spelling has some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase in plan that would be known as "EuroEnglish".
In the first year, "S" will replace the soft "S". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "C" will be dropped in favor of the "K". This should klear up konfusion and komputor keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "PH" will be replased with the "F". This will make words like "fotograf" 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated charges are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "E"s in the language is disgraseful, and they should go away.
By the 4th year, peopl wil be reseptiv to such steps as replasing "TH" with "Z" from vords kontaining "OU" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters. After zis yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trublis of difikulties and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech ozer.
ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU !